Matt's Cool and Interesting Blog of The New Millennium 

I REALLY need a job.

Hire me. I'll do anything for almost any price. Really.

Things I'll do for you.

Play an instrument. I play piano, trombone, drums (kinda), and mallets. I'll do this for up to 10 hours a day. Although, if it's trombone, I'll probably get really tired.

Program. I know C, C++, and Java. I can make games, and other things.

Make stuff. I can make all kinds of things. Even coffee!

Clean. I'm handy with a mop or a broom or a vacuum cleaner or a dust pan.

Computer things. I can do all kinds of computer stuff.

I'll work for cheap and do any shift you want! You just have to hire me!

Silly job

I had a job today. I know that you're asking yourself: who would a hoopy frood like Matt Fister work for?

Well, it was for Rohm and Haas.

They make powder products for a bunch of electronic companies.

They also are responsible for Morton Salts and the Morton salt girl.



I did not see the girl in the building where I worked. She may have had the day off.

I got this job through a temp agency, Chris Talarico and Associates, this is my first job through them, but they seem like a good company to work for. I was told that Rohm and Haas, was mass mailing a bunch of client companies and needed someone to stuff envelopes.


MattF to the rescue!

I got to work at 8:00. Right when I arrived I realized that I forgot my lunch. The day wasn't off to a good start.

I met my contact, and found out that they wouldn't be ready to print the letter's to be mailed for an hour. There were about 350 letters to be sent, and they figured it would take until 5:00 PM to finish up. Until they were ready for me I got to surf the internet. If I could get payed to surf the internet all of the time, my life would be very good.

I started stuffing envelopes at 9:45. I finished stuffing envelopes at 12:15.

I'm really good at stuffing envelopes. I stuffed 350 envelopes in 2 and a half hours. At that speed, in one 8 hour day I could stuff 1400 envelopes.

Since this was all they had for me to do, I then went home. This was good because I could then eat lunch.

So, want to hire the fastest envelope stuffer on the East Coast?

Matt Fister is available.

Bot change

[link=aim:goim?screenname=mattfbot]mattf bot[/link] has changed from running java-aimbot software to the program offered on runabot.com. The pros of this are that he is more sensible and expandable, the cons are that he won't come up with such bizarre things on his own and will feature a completely different (hopefully better) personality.

On another note, thanks to Chris for this:



It rocks!

One year!

Today is the one year anniversary of Matt's Cool and Interesting Blog of the New Millennium, the most cool and interesting site on the web. It's been a fun year, and hopefully I'll keep it going for another.

Thanks go to Blog Easy, for hosting me, all of my friends for keeping me motivated on doing this, and anyone who actually just stumbles across this and reads something.

Thanks!

A definition of man

In pictures


Thanks to cockeyed.com for the idea.

A confession

I want to apologize for misleading my readers for something I wrote in the past.

The post I wrote here on February, 17 2004 was a complete fabrication.

I have never been around the world on a publicity tour.

In fact, I have never been to France, India, or Mount Rushmore.

I have, however, met Jared Fogle. You can read about the truth here.

I apologize for any inconvenience this untruth may have caused.

Spam?!

I'm getting all of this weird spam as comments in my old entries. I'm not overly concerned with the spam, but the method of it is quite weird: many of the messages are just a name and email address with no actual comment. For example look here. The comment by "William". I have found a whole lot of these spamments, and they all have an email address with John in it in common. Weird.

There are loads of bot.

The Hazards of Miniature Golf

You know how in all of those stupid ice-breaking things you've done you are always asked, "what's your most embarassing moment?" This question is intended to break down everyone's defenses make them all feel like they're on the same level.

My problem is that I've never been able to think of something embarassing, and usually go with, "well, it seems that this would be my most embarassing moment since I can't come up with anything".

I'll no longer have to do this...

Last night, miniature golfing at Shell's, I hit a spectacular shot that fell off a ravine, hit the bank of a pond, bounced up and laterally across the ravine, and landed back in the water. The strange middle-aged couople behind me let out an "aw" and I hung my head in shame and walked across the ravine to retrieve my ball.

Suddenly, I had a foot in water, then another one. Somehow I had tripped while crossing the ravine and landed in the pool.
The strange couple was chokingly silent, two young girls to my right couldn't stop laughing, and the party ahead of me was staring awkwardly. I scrambled up back onto the green, let out a few laughs to show all was in good fun, and finished up the back nine squishy footedly.

To prevent this from happening to anyone else, please take this pledge:

I will not cross a ravine between too bodies of water, when I could instead cross a bridge.

Random Game I Like #26: Xenosaga: Episode 1

This is the most story rich game I have ever played, I think. With cool battles, great movie sequences, good characters, and a low price of just $20, it's a must buy. Check it out.

Back

I'm back from vacation. So...


That's it, I guess.