Matt's Cool and Interesting Blog of The New Millennium 

Carnivorous Plants Opinion Paper

//The following is an essay I wrote for my brother on carnivorous plants. He told that for his paper he needed an opinion section. I'm not quite sure what opinions one can have on carnivorous plants, but I wrote this opinion paper anyway. It's not intended to be serious or accurate. As a result, if your sense of humor has withered into darkness and rot, stop reading *now*.

Carnivorous Plants Opinion Paper


Carnivorous plants represent one of the most ardent challenges in opinion to American society. On the one hand, they are cooler than hippies and Black Doom Dragons combined. On the other hand, they eat flies, which my friends the flies say is bad, but often many flies are often bad. Eating bad flies is good to me, LOL. In this paper I will often try to discuss my opinion on Carnivorous Plants.

Carnivorous Plants the Coolness!

Carnivorous plants are, truthfully, rock-solid. I mean honestly, what can they do wrong? They sit there and then they eat flies that happen to be digested by the sweet nectar they secrete (or so I am told). They may or may not be able to photosynthesize, no one really knows (scientists might actually know...). This gives them a shroud of mystery, making them into an enigma, and enhancing their coolness. What else is cool about them? Well, huge species appear in the jungle, and after George of the Jungle, a character in a popular cartoon-television broadcast, hits a tree, he falls in and is eaten, much to the humorous enjoyment of one whom is watching the show. Although it may look like carnivorous plants only rock solid, there is also a bad side to them.

Carnivorous Plants: Totally Uncool...

As for each day there is a night, for every cool thing about carnivorous plants is paralleled by an "uncool" feature. EXAMPLE 1: Good flies are often eaten by such plants. The plants don't distinguish in their murder of flies. Good flies, bad flies... all flies die in the merciless hand of the carnivorous plant. Carnivorous plants are kind of like Al Capone. EXAMPLE 2: Much to the chagrin of George of the Jungle creator Marc Rudolfo, giant carnivorous plants do not exist, nor do they grow on Venus. On this issue, Marc Rudolfo says "I would get two or three letters per month about the inaccuracy of my show, as a result I cancelled it, I really did." (dramatization) EXAMPLE 3: The sweet nectar of the Venus Fly Trap is not really sweet. Believe me, I tasted it. And having a Venus Fly Trap stuck to your tongue for several days is bad for your social life. And ouchers! It does hurt a doosie.

Conclusion

In conclusion, carnivorous plants are sorta cool, and sorta fool if you get my drift. Hippis are always really cool though. Rock on man!

My apologies to Mr. Ferrell

Seems I spelled your name wrong several episodes ago. It's tricky with the two "l"s at the end.

As an apologetic gift, here is a link to site where you can hear a band's rendition of Frodo of the Nine Fingers, since that seems to be my number hit from Google.

I'd like to also note that I am now the number six site for a Yahoo search for "highschool communal showers". Now I can truly say I know what success feels like.

Random Game I Like #13: Fire Emblem

Fire Emblem is pretty cool, and almost exactly what you'd get if you mixed Advance Wars with Ogre Battle. Try it.

Good book!

Have you read the Illuminatus! trilogy and liked it? (Now 0.000000000000000000000000000003% of the worlds population is still interested.) Check out the Schrodinger's Cat Trilogy by Robert Anton Wilson, co-author of Illuminatus!.(More punctuation for more fun:!!*??..!...;) It's the sequel to Illuminatus! Read it.

Best of 2003: Part Two

And here it is: the

MATT'S COOL AND INTERESTING BLOG OF THE NEW MILLENIUM: BEST OF 2003: PART TWO

(That title is the best ever)

Best sandwich:

Any from Ginger's Deli, made by Pedro or the "Man in White". (The above picture is not really our Ginger's Deli, but they do have the same chairs...)

Best website (other than this one):
http://www.bookofratings.com/

Best television show:

Space Ghost

Best television program show bunch of things group thing:
Cartoon Network's Adult Swim

Best Candy:
Spree



Best person:


YOU

You have read my site, therefore you're the best person of 2003! Actually it is someone in particular, which may or may not be YOU. Really, it is, really.

I'm back at college!

Hold on, my editors and I are completing our compilation of the best of 2003.

The Best of 2003 (Part 1)

Alright here it comes...


It's the MATT'S COOL AND INTERESTING BLOG OF THE NEW MILLENIUM BEST OF 2003!!!

Let's start at the top

Best book

The Illuminatus Trilogy by Robert Anton Wilson and Robert Shea.

Best Movie

Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King. Read review below.

Best console video game.

Disgaea: Hour of Darkness for PS2

Best PC Game
I don't know any games I like for Pc that were released in 2003. I like a lot, but none really stand out.
So I'm giving the award to Dungeon Siege, because, after I finish writing this I'll probably play it.

Best online game
Gunbound
http;//www.gunbound.net

Soda
Jones Fufu berry


Part 2 coming soon...

Best of 2003: Suggestions?

Now that the New Year is here, I'm compiling a list of the best things of 2003. I need suggestions for categories though. Maybe you can give me some votes for your favorite things of 2003, too.

Video Game Review: Castlevania: Lament of Innocence

Wow, I haven't done a video game review yet. Let's see how it goes.

I was really excited about the new incarnation of Castlevania for several reasons. The screenshots looked good and it was being handled by the part of the team responsible for Castlevania: Symphony of the Night, possibly the greatest game ever made. Anyhow, this gives it hope beyond that awful 3-D N64 Castlevania quagmire.

But I'm still disappointed. It just doesn't feel like Castlevania. The graphics are pretty and the gameplay is decent, but something is wrong. I think it has something to do with the level design, but I'm just not sure. It's worth checking out anyway. And maybe, just maybe, Konami will give us all a BIG HUGE PRESENT and make us a 2D Castlevania game for the Playstation 2. So many people would buy it. Please...

Oh yeah, ummm, Castlevania gets 7 Anti-Soul Mysteries Labs out of 10, mainly for effort.

No topic.

This blog here, unlike most my posts, has no topic. I have lot's of things to say but they don't really relate well.

I got my grades for first semester today. Wait till you hear this... All As. I didn't think it was possible. My 3d Calc professor must have given us a mega curve. I hope my college friends did as well as I did.

I saw Lord of the Rings: Return of the King. That was a really good movie. I won't admit this to anyone, but for you dear reader, well, I'd like to tell you that I almost cried. 10 hairy hobbits out of 10.

I like Space Ghost a lot. Does anyone remember that old website they had? That was really funny. I think it disappeared from the internet when Adult Swim appeared. I don't have any problems with Adult Swim though. They have quite a line up. Except for the Oblongs. Will Ferrell doesn't save that show.

But Will Ferrell in SNL's Celebrity Jeopardy rocked. That's enough discussion for today.

Over and out.